fINDING tHAT mEANING

My body's numb from the fear of loving again. The thoughts running through my head like a person with insomnia. He was thinking is this world really meant for me because if it was why do i have so many problems. He said the Lord put us here for a reason but can we define that reason that which the Lord put us here. People said he put us here to find the true happiness in a loved one. But the weirdest thing of all is we really dont know how much we love someone until their gone. Why make such a precist gift of life if their going to die in this cruel world of anger and hate. The person who is happy and found that meaning of love why do they always get taken away. And he said to himself is this world meant for me or is it some game thats put on extreme with one lonely life left to live.